I... I don't know what to do.


Honestly, even at this point, I'm not sure whether or not to go back to Central, or to North. I mean, either way... I'll have things to lose, and things to gain. Equivilant exchange: to gain or to keep something, one must first give up something of equal value in return. Even though it's a quote from FullMetal Alchemist, I find that it very much relates to just about anything in real life. To gain something precious, one must give up something equally precious. Really, either way... I'll have things to lose, and things to gain.
Rebekka, I... I know you really want me to go back to North this year. But... I'm just not sure yet. I mean, if I go to North... I'd have to give up a lot of things I hold dear. If I go back to Central... I'd also have to give up things I hold dear. I mean, yeah, I can always invite you to Youth Group. However, I won't be able to see you every day. Then again, if I go to North, I won't be able to see my other friends every day...

I need more time to decide. I just wish I didn't have to make this decision. I really wish I didn't...

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On a side note, my Community Service will be done by this Friday. So, uh... when that comes and passes, expect drastically fewer journal entries, if any.

Anyhow... I love you all. Thank you so much for sticking through with me through all of this. I... truly don't deserve friends like you guys. What I did even disgusts myself. It may be the past, but when I think back... it disgusts me. Frankly, I'm embarrassed.
Rebekka, Brittany, Paige, you guys... I've never really gotten a chance to say this, but I love you all. It... takes a lot for me to actually tell someone that. It takes a lot of trust... a lot of myself, to tell someone I love them. You guys are awesome.

Goodbye, everyone. This will probably be the last journal entry for quite some time, so... I guess I'll try to keep in contact with you guys over the summer.